Quote of the Month

"You don�t see men at bars sitting around saying, �Can I play her voice mail for you so you can tell me by the tone of her voice if she likes me?�"

--Liz Tuccillo, co-author of �He�s Just Not That Into You,� when asked if men need a similar book

For the complete interview

It could be worse...it could have nipples

Dear Yankees Fans, pt. II

Please mail all your "1918", Babe Ruth, and all "Curse" signage to:

St. Louis Cardinals
250 Stadium Plaza
St. Louis, MO 63102

Dear Yankees Fans...

Hey guys, it's Sean again.

Yeah, I know. This sucks.

But remember this...

The Red Sox curse extends to winning the World Series not just beating us.

So if they lose to the 'Stros or Cardinals, feel free to still yell 1918 next year.

Oh and next year, the payroll will be $300 million.

Trust.

Love always
Yankees Fan for life
Sean (Melanism)

Black Star Nova

Mos Def and Talib Kweli should have released The New Danger and Beautiful Struggle, respectively, as a double CD like Outkast and titled it Contractual Obligations...

Yeah, it's like that...

Open Letter to Red Sox fans...

Hey Guys:

It's your buddy, Sean.

This is it.

This is YOUR year.

I'm not going to talk shit because I think you guys are going to win.

A matter of fact, I think you guys are going to crush us.

With Schilling and Pedro (we failed the paternity test) and that ri-fucking-diculous offense and our so-so (I'm being nice here), this is your year to make it to the World Series. And you get to make it through us which must be sweeter.

I won't post during the series. Only to show up to congratulate your team.

HOWEVER...

If you guys lose, I never want to hear about the Red Sox again.

I want this whole Red Sox - Yankees post everytime they play to end.

If the Red Sox can't beat the Yankees this year, then they NEVER will.

They say never say never.

I'M

SAYING

NEVER

The stars are aligned. All our pitchers couldn't win a game in minors right now except Mussina and Brown on a good day. Mariano is in Panama right now.

So you better do it this year.

Because if you don't...you guys should fucking kill that team.

Signed,
Sean (Melanism)

Going back to Cali

My flight leaves in one hour.

Los Angeles and San Francisco

12 days.

Will I even want to come back?

Did I mention it was Hard Work?

Nuff Respect

Some choice jokes by one of the kings of the jokes:

Oh, when I was a kid, everyone thought I got plenty of girls. I used to go to a drive-in movie and do push-ups in the backseat of my car.

A lot of girls turn me down. One girl turned me down, she said she had to go to work in the morning. I told her, "I'll be finished by then!"

Oh, my wife loves vacations. The other night she told me, "I wanna go someplace I've never been before." I took her to a men's room.

I'm trying a new diet now. The diet is Viagra and prune juice. I tell ya, I don't know if I'm coming or going.

I'll tell you one thing, I know how to satisfy my wife in bed, yeah, I leave.
----------------------------------
Man, no one tells jokes anymore

Rest in Piece

Why Jennifer Lopez Isn't The Shit...(revisited)

When I first started this little website (before there was a blogger.com) in March 2001, this was the first thing I wrote about. Now I personally have grown physically, mentally and emotionally. However, 2 marriages, a gang of bad movies and a clothing line later and I still feel the same way about her.

why Jennifer lopez isn't the shit...
(March 6, 2001)

now, i will not deny that Jennifer Lopez is a damn fine looking women.

if i could bag her, i would...

My boy, Dee, would kill me if i didn't BUT...I have problems with her...

as most of us know, jennifer lopez...sorry...j-lo, got her start as a dancer, most notably on keenan ivory wayans skit comedy "in living color". back then, she looked aight. Definitely, not the "flyest" fly girl (i wonder what they are up to anyway...now that Bobby Brown isn't making videos anymore)

then she was in Money Train with Wesley Snipes and Woody Harrelson which she was ok in. it was a nice little debut (mainly because she showed breast when boning Wesley Snipes' transit cop-who-knows-kung-fu character)

then the movies roles started coming in. she played selena (who coincidentally had a bigger, nicer ass than j-lo), u-turn (another sex scene), & out of sight (the real story should have been when george clooney stopped tilting his damn head when he spoke)...and she was aight in all those movies. she didn't suck but nothing to keep you eye on as a rising talent.

then "on the 6 came out". what the fuck??? she can't sing. i mean she can hold a couple of notes, i'll give her that much but her vocals are doubled up (the effect 2pac used on a lot of joints) and the songs are soooooo overproduced that it could make anyone sound semi-decent. the mtv exposure was extensive because she is fine and of course, there's her ass.

now, she does have a big ass. but, c'mon, damn near every tight african/african-american/carribean-american actress has got a tight ass and body to boot. same thing applies to angeline jolie's "full" lips (for the record, i would bag her if i could too). her ass ain't singing. her ass can't act.

and she had the nerve to come out with ANOTHER album.

came on saturday night live as host and musical guest and she LIP-SYNCHED. this ain't soul train.

why don't i find jennifer lopez to be the end-all be-all? because she's not good at what she does.

thandie newton is a fine woman who can act.

sade is a fine woman who can sing and write.

jennifer lopez is a fine woman who tries to sing and gets to act because she is fine.

she's a trumped-up janet jackson backup dancer.

maybe a model.

tops.

so what? i'm a hater.